Tag: self care

The Red Lantern – Dogs and Elk and Bears, Oh My!

Posted on by in Gaming

Have you ever wanted to quit your job, leave your home, journey to the winter tundra and live-in isolation with no-one but your pack of huskies for company? No? Not at all? Well then, you have not played The Red Lantern. Released last year by Timberline Studios, The Red Lantern is a story-driven game focused on you and your team of five sled dogs, as you attempt to navigate the Alaskan wilderness and reach your new home. Your survival is dependent on the resources you obtain during the journey, as well as those you remembered to pack in the first place.

The main selling point of the game, obviously, is your dog team. Every decision that you make will influence your dog’s wellbeing, whether that is rationing out food, using your limited medical supplies to heal a pup’s wounds or avoiding groups of elk in order to not upset one of your team. When you start a run, you have a limited number of resources – food, medicine, ammo and fire kindling. If you only have two bits of meat left, do you feed your pups and take the risk that you might starve before you reach your destination?

What is with all these awesome games and their gorgeous snow?

At the start of the game, you get to choose four dogs to add to your team from a choice of eight, meaning that there is enough variety to warrant a second playthrough, just to see each of their personalities. When you meet each dog, you are told a little about them and what they could bring to your team e.g., Bodega loves his treats, Iggy likes to hide in the snow and Noodle just needs some gosh darn love. Each pup has such a distinct personality and look to them that I want to cuddle them all and conquer the world with my army of huskies.

During my first run through the game, I had the following team:

  1. Chomper – He is the protagonist’s dog from their old life in the city and the leader of your little pack. His nemesis is squirrels.
  2. Barkley – Feisty but loyal, this big boy will fight bears to protect you.
  3. Fin – Can sniff anything and everything out, however, tends to find skunks instead. She is a very shy pup who does not like cuddles at first but comes around eventually.
  4. Slayer – Speedy, reliable and always ready to run. They are afraid of elk though. I do not blame the pup; those horns are scary.
  5. Stilton – A blue eyed angel who is an older pup but is as watchful as Heimdall. He will never steer you wrong.
LOOK AT THIS GOOD BOI.

With the incredible voice talent of Ashly Burch playing the protagonist and five loyal doggies by your side, each run through the game comes alive. The wildlife you encounter, the decisions you make, the beautiful night sky as your team races across a frozen lake, all add to a game that manages to perfectly encapsulate the exhilaration, isolation, fear and wonder that your protagonist feels as they try to make it in the harsh wilderness. Your only companions are your pack of hardworking pups and the various wildlife that litter the landscape, including some dickhead owls who led me into so many charging moose that I think they are just doing it on purpose now. Screw you owls. Screw you.

Similar to roguelike games such as Hades (which I will write about soon), The Red Lantern is a game of trial and error. Each run through the Alaskan wilderness, you come across different scenarios, forcing you to decide how you will spend your limited resources. When you eventually fail, be that from hunger, injury or exhaustion, you wake up in your van – ready to try again. However, what does not kill you makes you stronger. Say you freeze to death out there during a run, well your protagonist will realise that they need to pack more fire kindling. If you find a key item whilst you are exploring, it becomes a permanent part of your inventory for all future runs. Trust me, you will never be more excited to find a bit of flint than when you have run out of kindling for the fourth run in a row.

The dark may contain horrors but I’ll keep them at bay.

The Red Lantern is filled with little moments that stick with you from run to run. Each dog on your team has a miniature story arc that you can pursue, allowing you to dig into their personality and bond with them. Every story has its own merits and memorable interactions, but Fin’s arc was what stuck with me the most over my time with the game.

Fin is a shy pup. Known as a keen tracker by her previous owners, Fin is an independent soul who prefers the wild to her comfortable doghouse and the affection of her musher. To begin with, Fin will only cautiously sniff your hand, preferring to keep her distance from both you and the more boisterous dogs (looking at you Chomper). One night though, you wake up to discover that your beanie is missing. Checking the camp, you see that Fin has it clutched in her paws as she sleeps, using your scent to soothe her. The next time you go to sleep, the game gives you an option to let Fin have your beanie – which although it leaves you cold, brings the pup comfort. Later on, she lets you scratch her, happy for the love. The game makes you work for her affection, builds that relationship of trust and gives you a sense of accomplishment when you see that tail wag.

That notification honestly made my day.

More than anything, The Red Lantern is about having faith in your team and in yourself. Life is filled with the mistakes we have made. I have screwed up more times that I have pairs of socks. It is what you choose to take from those missteps that will make all the difference later down the line. Just because you have screwed up before, does not mean you will never succeed. You need to believe in yourself, because in the end, you are the only one whose opinion really matters. Our friends and family, we love them dearly but, in the end, it is your burden to bear, not theirs. A failure is a setback, not an unbreakable roadblock. That is something that I am still struggling to remind myself of. Especially now, where my mental health is not in a great place. I know that I used to be in a much better place. I know that I can take better care of myself. However, that does not lessen the effort it has taken to build myself back up to this point.

Anyways, that’s enough existential crisis conversation for this week. Thank you all for your kind words on last weeks piece and I hope you will continue to support everything I do. New D&D episode coming Saturday evening as well, which has been a delight to edit since it is essentially Phoenix Wright on drugs. It will make sense when you listen, I promise.

Take care, stay safe and wash those hands.

Caitlin RC

The Elephant In The Room.

Posted on by in Uncategorized

As you may have guessed from the title, I want to talk about the COVID-19 Pandemic that is sweeping the world. Personally, I’ve been self-isolating for around two weeks now and haven’t left the house for 10 days. After my last trip to the pharmacy to pick up my medication, I started feeling a bit off. Then I developed a persistent cough and a slight fever. I think I’m almost back to full health. However, there are so many that are not as lucky.

The elderly, the disabled, the immunocompromised and the key workers on the front lines of this pandemic, are all so much more susceptible to this sickness. Whilst I sit on my bed writing this, thousands of people are out working to save lives, feed families and keep the communities that we have strived so hard to build, intact. If you are one of them, I salute you. Meanwhile, the rest of us are (hopefully) staying inside and dealing with the new problems that weeks of self-isolation have created.

In times like this, mental health pushes its way to the forefront of our minds. Although isolation is the best way to prevent the spread of the virus, it is a double-edged sword. Humans are inherently social creatures. The connections we form with those we love are critical to our mental wellbeing. Loneliness and isolation can be the two biggest triggers when it comes to a declining mental state.

You know that scene in films, where the lead character is all happy and cheerful until they are alone in their room – at which point they slide down the door and burst into tears? It’s not that far from the truth. In public we tend to put on a facade that we think those around us want to see. We’re scared of judgement, of hatred or cruelty. More than that, we’re scared that people won’t understand us.

That fear, that dread and anxiety? Most of the time, that goes away when you talk to your friends and family about it. You see the love they have for you on their faces, you hear it in their voices. Their support and loyalty are crystal clear. However, when all you have is some text on a screen or a phone call that only seems to last a few minutes, it becomes hard to prove that little nagging voice in your head wrong.

I’m lucky enough to be staying at my house in Cardiff with my housemates. I have an amazing community that supports me, and my parents regularly check up on me to ensure I haven’t fallen asleep under a pile of laundry like a cat. However, even with all this, that voice grows louder each day I spend in self-isolation. I can only imagine how much louder it would be if I was alone.

We’ve talked about the negative spiral multiple times in many different contexts. Yet again, that painful loop rears it’s head in this crisis. For each day that I feel ill, or unmotivated or sad, I am not productive. A lack of productivity makes me feel guilty. That guilt makes me question my own abilities and my self-worth. That leads to a lack of self-care and more days where I simply cannot face being productive. It just goes around and around, endlessly.

I don’t regret staying inside. I don’t regret self-isolating. By staying home, I am protecting people. My body is healthy enough to fit off this illness but not everyone is so lucky. By doing this, we are protecting the key workers. By doing this, I am protecting someone’s loved ones from falling ill. Who knows, maybe by staying home, I could have saved someone’s life.

The main issue I have had with staying home and isolated, is that I am scared I am losing myself. Not in a big way or anything. Just small pieces that get chipped off as the days go by. Bits of my identity. Be that my friendships, my love of theatre, the campaigns I run for my friends, the video games I play or the relationships I hold with my family. Sometimes, when you’re alone, you feel that you have no control, that it’s all slipping away.

That’s ok.

I’ll be ok.

And I hope you will too.

CaitlinRC.